The (500) Days of Summer Dating Theory

If you have seen (500) Days of Summer, you know it’s appeal, and if you haven’t, you need to.  (500) Days of Summer is the perfect anti-Romantic Comedy.  It’s adorable, it’s funny, it’s sad.  You want to love Summer and hate her at the same time.

However, to me, it is more than the perfect date movie.  It is slowly becoming a relationship predictor.  Now it is a super basic theory, that hasn’t been overly tested.  I would love to hear about your successes or failures with this theory.

The Theory

On a basic level, the movie (500) Days of Summer can predict how successful a beginning relationship will turn out.

To Test

1. Grab your significant other and watch (500) Day of Summer.
2. After the film is over, casually start a conversation about what you thought of it.
3. Once the conversation is rolling, volunteer which of the two main characters you identify the most with.
4. Encourage you significant other to do the same.
5. Compare results.

Predicted Results

A successful relationship can only thrive between people that identify with the same character.  Two Toms pair well together, and two Summers pair well together.  However, a Tom and a Summer should be warned if they want to date.

Now I know this seems obvious, or too simple, but you’d be surprising how much this movie prompts you to open up about yourself and your dating past!

-Alice Ambrosia

Arete's "The 'Not' One Night Stand"

PenName and I were officially broken up and I was in desperate need of male attention to reassure myself that I could still ensnare the attention of one. My (at the time) 5-year relationship was dead, having been ripped to shreds by soap opera-esque drama, leaving me a lonely, insecure second-semester freshman.

The solution to my doubts and new found freedom was easy: I was going to find a one night stand.

Smokes was a peer of mine. We mostly smoked together, and the mutual people we knew where either through smokers or the few theater people I knew. He was obviously interested in me, leaving him a clear choice in my book.

Smokes and my sorority sister had previously had a relationship. But even then she still made it very clear that she did not mind if anyone fooled around with or got involved with Smokes— I should have seen this as a sign that something might have been awry.

After literally propositioning Smokes for sex (I asked him if he had condoms in his room and if he’d be available at 10), and doing the deed, I believed that I had successfully pulled off a one night stand, no strings attached. It was to my understanding that all males looked for sex and that my no strings attached mission would be godsend.

My expectation for the night:

I would sleep with Smokes and that would be it. Maybe I would send him a text the day after, but my nothing more would become of our one night stand. Being a guy, he would let our distance grow and eventually our working/social relationship would be back to normal.

What really happened:

“Do you want to go out sometime, get to know each other better, take things a bit further?” He appeared to be looking for more.


After a few awkward days where Smokes attempted to ask me out on dates or catch my eye in the dining hall, we had spoken and I finally made it clear that I had no interest in his advances and that I had never meant to hurt him, which I clearly had after all of my avoidance and what “not”. He had taken my advances to be that of wanting more.

I had missed the signs that should have let me see he wanted more: the walks, the texts, the concerned faces and him asking me to spend the night, literally right after having sex with him.
I had had enough nerve and presence to flaunt myself at Smokes, but I didn’t have the brains to tell him straight up that I wasn’t looking for anything more. I hadn’t taken the time to understand that maybe guys aren’t always the guys we think they might be.

While not the guy for me, Smokes was just another guy (of so many) who are looking for more than just sex, even when offered just that. Whether or not Smokes genuinely wanted something deeper, I’ll never know. Regardless, I’m where I need to be in the dating world and I’m here because of that experience, knowing that not all guys are jerks, man whoring and sleeping around like I attempted to do. Go figure.

Oh and don’t sleep with your sister’s exes.

The end.